Art of Canine Communication

How I Taught My Dog Sherry the Human Language

By

VIKRAM KARVE

Part 1: Donkey Language


Before I tell you how I taught my pet dog Sherry the human language here is an apocryphal story:

A wise man, a renowned teacher, once publicly vowed that he would eradicate illiteracy and teach everyone to read.

Some mischievous boys brought a donkey to the teacher and asked him if he could teach the donkey to read.

The wise teacher stunned the students by taking up the challenge and said, “Give me the donkey for a month and I will teach it to read.”

The teacher went home and began to train his donkey to read. At first he put the donkey into the stable and gave him no food for some days. Then he found a thick book and put some hay between the pages. In the beginning the teacher turned the pages and gave the donkey the hay between the pages.

After a while the donkey learnt to turn the pages with his tongue to find and eat the feed by itself. Each time when the donkey finished the book and found no more feed between the pages it would bray: “Eee aah, Eee aah!”

Three days before the one month period was over the teacher stopped feeding the donkey till the poor donkey after fasting for three days without a morsel of food was voraciously hungry.

On the fateful day when the whole school assembled to see the miracle of the donkey reading, the wise teacher brought the ravenously hungry donkey onto the stage. He asked for a big book and put it in front of the donkey.

The hungry donkey turned the first page of the book with its tongue and when it could not find any feed the donkey brayed: “Eee aah, Eee aah!” and turned one more page, and again not finding any hay it cried: “Eee aah, Eee aah!”

The famished donkey kept turning the pages of the book one by one with its tongue and when it could not find any feed between the pages its braying grew louder and louder and soon the hapless donkey was turning the pages and shrieking in a loud voice: “Eee aah, Eee aah!” till it reached a crescendo.

Proud of his achievement the wise teacher said to the gathering: “You all have seen that the donkey has turned the pages of the book and he read it.”

One of the naughty students asked: “But we could not understand anything.”

The wise teacher replied: “Of course you could not understand what the donkey read because it was donkey language. In order to understand it you have to learn donkey language. Come to me for tuition in the evening. I will teach you donkey language.”

[To be continued…]

VIKRAM KARVE

Copyright © Vikram Karve 2009

Vikram Karve has asserted his right under the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988 to be identified as the author of this work

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Greed, Love, Lust

GREED AND LUST

[A Teaching Story from the Panchatantra]

By

VIKRAM KARVE


There was an old man, a good natured simple farmer, who had a young wife.

The young wife was not satisfied with her aged simpleton husband, neglected her household work, and always yearned for the company of young handsome men.

One day, a smart young good-looking man saw her and seeing that she was alone went to her and said, “You are the most beautiful woman in the world and I am the most eligible bachelor. I have fallen in love with you the moment I saw you. Please give me the pleasure of your company.”

Delighted, the woman said to the young Casanova, “Listen my dear, my husband has a lot of wealth. He is old and of no use to me. I will take out all the money and jewellery and let us elope to some other town and live there happily ever after.”

The con-man was very happy and asked her to bring all her wealth to the mango orchard near the river at midnight where he would be waiting for her.

“We will both disappear in the darkness and head for the next town,” he told assured her.
The lusty woman waited till it was dark and when her husband fell asleep she stole all the money, jewellery and gold, packed it in a bag and left the house at midnight to meet the trickster at a place he had indicated. The trickster took the bag full of money and gold from her on the pretext that he would carry it and walked towards the river.

The smart young handsome man looked at the woman and thought, “What is the point of wasting my whole life with this woman? She seems a bit older than me too and soon may turn into a shrew. Also if she couldn’t be loyal to her husband she may ditch me too for someone else. It is better I dump her but take her money and jewellery with me.”

With these thoughts in mind he told the woman, “Look, my dear, it is very difficult to cross the river. I will first swim with the money bag to the other side of the river and keeping it there I will come back and carry you on my back.”

She readily agreed and gave the bag to her new found lover.

He asked her to take off her clothes too and give them to him to carry across the river as he felt her clothes would hinder swimming. She took off all her clothes and gave them to the man who swam across the river the money-bag and her clothes.

Covering her naked body with her hands, the woman began waiting restlessly for her lover to return.

Just then a jackal with a piece of meat in his mouth happened to pass by. The jackal saw that big juicy fish had been washed ashore by a wave and desperate to catch it the jackal ran towards the fish and in the process he dropped the meat piece from his mouth.

But suddenly another big wave took the fish back into the water.

Disappointed, the jackal went back to pick up the piece of meat, but meanwhile a crow dived down fast and took the meat piece away before the jackal could reach it.

The woman laughed at the greedy jackal who had lost the both the fish and also the piece of meat.

Hurt by the woman’s behaviour, the jackal said, “Don’t laugh you stupid woman. I lost a piece of meat due to my greed but you have lost everything – your husband, your lover and your wealth – due to your lust.”

Tell me, Dear Reader, what is the moral of this story?

THE SEED OF WISDOM

[A Teaching Story]

By

VIKRAM KARVE

[Dear Reader, do read and reflect on this apocryphal tale, a teaching story I heard long back, from one of my teachers, I think]

Once upon a time there was a childless King who wanted to choose a worthy successor to his throne after he passed away.

He called all the young children in his kingdom to his palace one day and said: “It has come time for me to choose the next King. I have decided to choose one of you as my successor, as my Crown Prince, and groom you to be the King after I am gone.”

The amazed children listened spellbound as the King spoke: “I am going to give each one of you a seed today – Just One Seed. It is a very special seed. I want you all to go home, plant the seed, water it, nurture it, and come back here to me exactly one year from today with the plant you have grown from this one seed. I will then judge the plants that you bring to me and whoever grows the best plant will be the Crown Prince, the next King after me.”

There was one small shy boy who was there that day and he, like the others, received a seed from the King. He went home and excitedly told his mother the whole story. She helped him get a pot and some planting soil, and he planted the seed and watered it regularly and nurtured it carefully. Twice every day, in the morning and in the evening, the small shy boy would water the seed lovingly and watch to see if it had germinated and grown.

After a few days, some of the other children began to talk about their seeds and the lovely plants that were beginning to grow, but the small shy boy kept going home and checking his seed, disappointed that nothing was growing from his seed.

Days passed, then weeks, and months, but still there was no sign of a plant growing from the small shy boy’s seed. But the small boy still kept lovingly watering his seed regularly hoping that it would germinate.

By now the others were talking about their wonderful healthy plants but small shy boy didn't have a plant and he felt like a failure, but he kept persevering and nurturing his seed with love and dedication in the optimistic hope that his seed would someday sprout a plant.

Six months went by and there was still no sign of a plant in the small shy boy’s pot.

Everyone else had exquisite tall plants, but he had nothing. Inwardly he feared that maybe he had killed his seed but the small shy boy didn't say anything to his friends and kept on tenderly watering and nurturing his seed with dogged determination and doting devotion in the fond hope that his seed would grow and blossom into a beautiful plant.

Finally, one year passed, and all the children of the kingdom brought their plants to the King for inspection.

The small shy boy was scared and did not want to take his desolate plant-less pot with just the soil and seed to the King, but his mother encouraged him to go, to take his pot with him, and to be honest about everything.

The small shy boy felt fearful and nervous, but he listened to his mother and took his barren pot to the King.

When the small shy boy arrived at the King’s Palace, he was astonished to see the variety of beautiful and exotic plants grown by all the other children.

Totally crestfallen, the small shy boy put his desolate pot on the floor and everyone jeered in derision and mocked him. A few children felt pity for him and tried to console the small shy boy.
Suddenly the King arrived, looked around the hall appraising the plants and showered words of praise to the gathered children: “It is really amazing – you all have really grown fantastic beautiful plants, trees and flowers. I am truly impressed. Today, one of you is going to be selected as the Crown Prince to be the next King!”

The small shy boy shivered with tremors of trepidation and overcome with shame tried to hide in the back.

The King’s eyes searched all over and suddenly he saw the small shy boy at the back of the hall with his barren pot.

The King ordered his guards to bring him in front of the throne.

The small shy boy was terrified. “When the King sees my pot, how badly I have failed in the task he gave me, he is sure to punish me!”

Seeing how frightened the small shy boy was, the King stepped down from his throne, walked down towards the petrified boy, lovingly put his hand on the small shy boy’s shoulders and announced: “This boy is your new King!”

The small shy boy could not believe his ears – it was unbelievable that the King should select a failure and loser like him who couldn’t even sprout his seed be the Crown Prince.

The King escorted the small shy boy to the throne and said to everyone: “One year ago I gave all of you a seed. I told you to take the seed, plant it, water it, and bring it back to me today. But what you did not know is that I gave you all boiled seeds that would not grow. Except this honest boy, all of you have brought me beautiful plants with exotic flowers and even trees with fruit. When you found out that the seed would not grow, you substituted another seed for the one I gave you. This boy was the only one with the sincerity to nurture the barren seed for one whole year with dedication, hope and perseverance and had the courage and honesty to bring me the desolate pot with my seed in it. Therefore, I select him as my Crown Prince to be the next King!”

Tell me Dear Reader; is this “teaching” story relevant in today’s world?

VIKRAM KARVE

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vikramkarve@sulekha.com

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Some More Teaching Stories

Here are some more teaching stories.

I am sure you have read the earlier one’s – if you haven’t, dear Reader, just click the link below – and after you’ve read them remember to come back here –

http://vikramkarve.sulekha.com/blog/post/2008/06/teaching-stories.htm


Teaching stories have a special quality. If read in a certain kind of way they produce spiritual growth. There are three ways to read teaching stories:-

• Read the story once. Then move on to another. This manner of reading will give you entertainment; maybe produce a laugh, like a joke.

• Read the story twice. Reflect on it. Apply it to your life. That will give you a taste of theology.

• Read the story again, after you have reflected on it. Carry the story around in your mind all day and allow its fragrance, its melody to haunt you. Create a silence within you and let the story reveal to you its inner depth and meaning. Let it speak to your heart, not to your brain. This will give you a feel for the mystical and you will develop the art of tasting and feeling the inner meaning of such stories to the point that they transform you.

Read on, Dear Reader, and transform yourself:


BEAUTY


Nasrudin bought an old haunted house [a “Bhoot Bangla”] at a desolate place in a nearby hill-station.

From time to time he would suddenly pack his bags, leave the city, and go away to his house in the hill station, disappearing for days, sometimes for weeks, sometimes for months. And just as suddenly as he used to disappear, he used to unpredictably return back to the city, suddenly, without any warning or notice.

When asked the reason for his erratic and whimsical behaviour, Nasrudin explained:

“I have kept a caretaker woman up there in the hills to look after my house. She is the ugliest woman - horrible, repulsive, hideous, nauseating. Just one look at her and one feels like vomiting.

When I go to live there, at first she looks horrible. But slowly, slowly, after a few lonely days, she is not so horrible. Then after some more desolate forlorn days, she doesn’t seem that undesirable. And as more and more time passes in lonesome seclusion, a day comes when I start seeing some beauty in her.

The day I start seeing beauty in that horrid woman I escape from the hill-station, because that means enough is enough – I have lived away from the real world for too long - now even this horrible revolting woman has started looking beautiful! I may even fall in love with this ghastly ugly repugnant woman - that's dangerous.

So I pack up my things and rush back to the city.”



RECIPE


One day Mulla Nasrudin went to the fish market and bought a fine Pomfret fish.

On the way home he met a friend who gave him a special recipe for cooking the Pomfret fish.

Nasrudin was very happy, and his mouth watered as in his mind’s eye he was already relishing the delicious dish of Pomfret fish he was going to enjoy for dinner.

While he was daydreaming, a large crow suddenly swooped down from the sky and stole the fish from his hands and flew off with the Pomfret fish.

“You thief! “Mulla Nasrudin angrily shouted at the crow, “You have stolen my fish. But you won’t enjoy it – I have got the recipe!”



LOGIC


Visiting a new place, Mulla Nasrudin was walking on the road and a vicious looking dog barked at him and began menacingly running towards him.

Mulla Nasrudin quickly bent down to pick up a mile-stone fixed on the side of the road divider to throw at the animal. He could not lift it, for the stone was cemented firmly to the earth.

“What a strange place this is! What crazy logic?" Nasrudin exclaimed. "They tie up the stones and let the dogs go free."

And then he sped off!

VIKRAM KARVE

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TEACHING STORIES

Teaching stories may relate events that are funny, foolish, bemusing, sometimes even apparently stupid, but they usually have deeper meanings.

A good teaching story has several levels of meaning and interpretation and offers us opportunities to think in new ways. At first you may just have a good laugh but as you reflect on the story, the significance becomes more and more profound.

A teaching story veils its knowledge and as you ruminate, the walls of its outer meanings crumble away and the beauty of the previously invisible inner wisdom is revealed, and you begin to identify yourself in the story, and to acknowledge that you too could be as foolish or as lacking in discernment as the characters in these classic tales.

An example of the concept of teaching stories is embodied in the “wisdom” tales of the inimitable Mulla Nasrudin narrated by Sufis to illustrate finer aspects of human behaviour which are relevant to both our personal and professional lives.

You can reflect, introspect or take them with a pinch of salt – the choice is yours! After reading this you may ask me: “You relate stories, but you do not tell us how to understand them” – to which I will reply:” How would you like it if the shopkeeper from whom you bought a banana peeled it, ate the deliciously nourishing fruit before your eyes, leaving you only the skin?”

One of the great bonuses in learning through humour is that even as you have a good time and doubt that you have learned anything, the lessons penetrate subtly, permeate within and stay with you, to come alive when the need arises.

If you are a serious type, devoid of a sense of humour, please skip this and move on to more profound and sombre reading. This is fun. Enjoy yourself, dear reader, and try to identify yourself in the apocryphal stories.

TRAFFIC DISCIPLINE

Rushing to work on his motorcycle Nasrudin jumped a red light. He was promptly stopped by a Traffic Policeman, who asked Nasrudin to pay Rs.100.

“What for? Why should I pay Rs.100?” Nasrudin asked.

“It’s a fine. For breaking the traffic rules. You jumped the red light,” said the cop.

“Okay,” Nasrudin said, “You owe me five hundred rupees. Give me Rs.500.”

“What nonsense?” shouted the infuriated cop. “Why should I pay you Rs.500?”

“For the six times I correctly crossed the green lights, you owe me Rs.600. From that you deduct your fine of Rs.100. That means you owe me Rs.500,” said a nonchalant Nasrudin. “If you punish me for doing the wrong thing, you must reward me for doing the right thing.”

THE RIGHT SOLUTION

Strolling on a beach, Nasrudin noticed some fishermen huddled lighting a fire near a wooden boat, and curious, he asked a them what it was for.

“We are melting tar,” said a fisherman.

“Tar?” Nasrudin asked confused.

“Yes, we are making tar to cover the cracks in the underside of the boat. That makes the vessels go faster.”

Nasrudin rushed straight home and made a bonfire. Then he tied up his donkey and melted some tar in a pan. As soon as he brought the smoking tar near the animal, it broke loose, ran like the wind and disappeared over the horizon.

“It works all right!” reflected Mulla Nasrudin.


GRIEF

The donkey did not return for many days and Nasrudin was overcome with grief.

“You may have lost your donkey, Mulla Nasrudin, but you don’t have to grieve over it more than you did about the loss of your first wife.”

“Ah,” Nasrudin said, “if you remember when I lost my wife, all you villagers consoled me and said: ‘We will find you someone else.’ So far, nobody has offered to replace my donkey.”


FASHION SHOW

One day Nasrudin went to a fashion show and his friends asked him how he liked it.

“They cheat you,” Nasrudin complained, “They show you the women – and then they try to sell you the clothes.”


TIP

Nasrudin went to a posh restaurant and ordered a cup of coffee. He was dressed in ordinary clothes and received no attention. While leaving he left a tip of one thousand rupees.

The next day he came dressed in a three-piece suit. The waiters and all the staff lavished him with the highest attention thinking they would receive an even more generous tip.

After thoroughly enjoying the pampering, Nasrudin left a tip of just one rupee, saying: "This is for the service you gave me yesterday, the thousand rupees were for the service today."

Hope you enjoyed the stories

VIKRAM KARVE

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